If vampires were real?....What a nutty question....okay I must blog about it then. I love the odd ball weirdo questions.
Okay, here is a very brief summery of the history of the "Vampire" Legend. The tales of those that come in the night to feed on the blood of humans is older than the bible itself. But before you have a total cow with that, lets back step a bit. Perhaps this was a way to keep youngsters close to home or keep them from venturing from their beds at night? Some people thought they were real because when they dug someone up who had been buried for awhile, they had long Dracula nails and fangs...when all reality science proves that as your cuticles decay it makes your nails appear to be longer...and the teeth...well k-9 teeth always stick out...they just look dramatic when there are no lips or skin. So, it was chalked up to mistaken natural occurrences. But that didn't stop the story from flooding down from generation to generation. Some added somethings so that children wouldn't be so frightened, like that cant come in unless you invite them. Or the sunlight burns their skin, or you can kill them with a wooden stake to the heart. Many movies and shows have been made around this story, I admit I enjoy a good vampire story. I mean how alluring...to never age or die, to have all this power over humans, to basically be the most elite killer. Who wouldn't be fascinated by all that. Some stories they try to humanize vampires, by making them fall for a human, or by making them have human dreams of being a singer or something, or a teen who is just trying to fit in with the human world. It makes us all just move more to the edge of our seat. I mean look at twilight. people just ate that crap up. I loved the books...the movies...puke.
What would I do if a vampire was real...um, run...duhh. Im not stupid enough to think that it will love me or spare me or what have you. No..im their food...and their hungry so I better be crafty in my escape. But in all reality Id probably just stand there trying to make sense of what I was seeing and just say "well Shit!"
Maybe They would think for a small second well that human was funny...but then they would forget about me as my cold dead body hit the ground. If you look at the whole vampire thing as a virus...why would they ever fall in love with their food. I mean yeah...we have pets..but I doubt they would look at a human like we look at a puppy. Face it...if they wanted in..they get in...if they want to eat you...they will. You cant appeal to a human emotion...cause their not human. Not anymore my friends...so if your mom or someone comes at you all pasty and trying to eat you...don't try to beg...or look for a stake...cut that ladies head off and hope its enough lol. They are made to kill you...to be faster and smarter and more evolved than you...your not going to get one to love you...even if your a damn supermodel. And personally...I'm not gonna make it easy for them...or enjoyable by screaming "No please don't kill me..." I'm gonna be like "well...do your worst you son of a bitch..i hate you already!" Then I would try to be a super ninja lol. But...still wind up dead in the end. Ooh well...at least I gave them some shit! Who likes being predictable...snooze. Then I could go to heaven and everyone would be like...I got hit by a train...or got the cancer...how did you die?...oohhh you know...trying to stomp this bad ass vampires face, it didn't quite work out...but I did get a lick in. Could you imagine the reaction to that lol.
If I was offered the chance to be one...id definitely mull it over lol. But I don't think I would choose it. I mean I really don't want to walk around for all eternity as this serial killer...blood is gross..I mean do you know what is in that! I don't like that as a food option. And helllo..I'm Irish..Ive been pasty my whole life...my goal is to get a tan so I stop looking dead...so yeah..no thanks. What if I eat someone I cared about. Id have to live with that forever...and how do you off yourself if your a vampire? Too much pain and struggle and loneliness. I can barley stand people now...I cant imagine being stuck on earth forever. Its more of a curse than a blessing. Id rather age gracefully and have a short run at life. Maybe I will get lucky and be reincarnated. There is more possibility as a human I think.
What about you? What would you do if a vampire was real????
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